GUEST POST: Turning Adversity Into Opportunity: Thriving After Major Life Changes 

By Laura Kokinda, PhD, founder of Modern Mid, is a clinical psychologist with 20+ years of experience. She specialises in personality assessment, leadership development, and the connection between behaviour and environment, helping individuals grow with clarity and confidence.

The only thing constant is change. But sometimes change can hit harder than normal. Major life events can unexpectedly require significant changes in direction, but life is different for everyone. That’s why if we can shape our perspective of change for good, then we have an advantage to thrive in the chaos of unexpected things happening to us. Here, we are going to discuss four different scenarios of major life changes we can rise above and view these as a time for opportunity.

1. Gaining Stability After a Major Natural Disaster

Experiencing a natural disaster such as a wildfire, hurricane, tornado, or earthquake can change your life in seconds. Homes and communities can be endangered and wiped away with no warning signs or time to prepare. The sense of safety is gone. 

When natural disasters occur, the top priorities suddenly become survival and physiological needs, such as food and shelter. Ironically, people can begin to find clarity about what really matters in life. Material belongings are no longer as essential as they used to be. The thought of having a more simple life is a bit more appealing. If the situation leads to moving to another home, there is a new sense of strength and confidence that can be found in navigating through a challenge such as leaving a place that used to be stable and finding it elsewhere. Rebuilding can take time, but having a fresh start can end up leading to new opportunities that may have been unexpected but end up being prosperous.

2. Embracing a Career Shift

One of the most common life changes for people can be enduring a career change. Whether it’s due to a layoff, downsizing, or the realisation that the career isn’t your path, changing careers can throw you into a whirlwind of uncertainty. We all deserve to make a living by doing something we enjoy, which is why positive change ideally comes out of having to switch jobs. 

Whether it’s your choice or not, changing careers can have you questioning your identity, need for stability, and life’s purpose. It’s hard not to get caught up in ruminating thoughts and deciding what’s the next best move. But once the situation has settled in a bit, usually the new direction becomes more clear. This world is full of opportunity, and sometimes we need to be faced with adversity to rise above and challenge ourselves. A change in career isn’t just a new job, it can be setting the tone for your great life’s journey and finding a better flow state. Changing careers can offer you a chance to find something meaningful that you may never have seen if you weren’t pushed to do so.

3. Growth After Heartache

Whether it’s a romantic breakup, loss of a loved one, or the feeling of being betrayed, personal devastation can be life changing. Our entire persona can shift based on a major life event that causes pain and heartache. In order to grow, we must shed our past selves by growing from our painful and personal experiences.

When dealing with heartache, it’s important to sit with your grief. These sorts of events are not meant to be pushed aside for them to go away. Emotional trauma can be utilised as an amazing opportunity for personal growth and development. You are given a chance to learn more about yourself and what truly matters to you in this world. Using personal pain as a catalyst for change can give you the chance to be a better version of yourself and the opportunity for introspection. With external factors affecting us, these instances can make us more resilient and dependent on ourselves rather than others. 

4. Transitioning to a Healthier Lifestyle

While it’s ideal to maintain a healthy diet and regular exercise, life gets busy, and it’s easy to not always make the healthiest decisions. Eating fast food or hitting the couch after work can become a routine in this fast-paced life, and before we know it, our health is at risk. Sometimes, it takes a catalyst and a ‘wake-up call’ to realize that we need to take our health more seriously. If dealt a serious diagnosis or a disruption in feeling our best, we are faced with a decision: are we going to make changes or not? It’s always best to be proactive, but we can ideally make changes if we notice something is off. Take the time to stop and reflect on your routines. Use any health alerts as an opportunity to make improvements. By maintaining a positive attitude and putting in the work, there can be successful changes to a healthier lifestyle when faced with adversity. 

How to Handle the Adversity

Regardless of the situation, there are four steps we can take to assess and make progress with a difficult situation.

1. Accept the pain. It’s important for you to sit with the grief and accept the moment that has taken place. Living in denial will not create growth. It’s healthy and strong-minded to reflect on what’s taken place and let the feelings flow through you. Use emotional-regulation tools to work through your triggers, such as somatic exercises or breathwork, to keep mental stability. 

2. Find a Purpose. Once you’ve accepted the event that has occurred, now what? Find a purpose. Think about how this situation can be used as a positive catalyst for change and focus your energy there. Think of small, attainable goals as you start to pave a new way for change.

3. Gain some momentum. Once you’ve gained focus and are able to make some progress on what’s next for you, stay consistent with your goals. Keep your tasks simple and consider that even doing one small item is a step in the right direction because you’re keeping momentum going. Once you start and gain a progressive routine, there’s no looking back.

4. Stay present. It’s easy to ruminate and get stuck in the past of what could have been and what may have been lost. But that won’t help with achieving your goals and personal growth. Once you’ve accepted the situation and there’s no changing what has happened, it’s important to stay present and keep moving forward. 

Change Is Inevitable

There is beauty in change, as we are challenged to become stronger and more capable than we thought we once were. When faced with adversity, you’d be surprised how much you can actually handle and rise above. Change gives us an opportunity to thrive and knock us out of our comfort zone. When unexpected events occur, keep a strong mind and stay confident that you are going to make it through, and that could lead to a new path you never even knew existed.